At the weekend, I put aside my fears and walked back into my local slimming world group. It’s been on the cards for months but I’ve not had the time or headspace to give it 100% but with the new year and new routine of staying at home with our baby boy, it was now time to refocus and look after me. It’s a brand new group, new venue and new weighing day but it works for me and my boys so there was no excuse!
I have gained a lot. I have always known what I have weighed so the numbers on the scales didn’t shock me. I’m stuck in a rut with my clothing, feeling trapped in jeans and a jumper and I want out. I want to wear something more put together, more stylish and something that suits me, more dresses and perhaps even a skirt or two. But, I don’t feel confident wearing those type of clothes yet, I want to look in the mirror and feel good about myself and look good. I don’t want to feel like I’m wearing a tent or a big baggy jumper that hides my mum tum, my wobbly arms and everything else.
I’m not going to dwell on how I don’t have any body confidence at the moment, it’s true, I don’t. I wish I could be more confident but it’s just not there. But I know that in time, when the weightloss happens, my confidence will grow as a slimmer me emerges. I know what I need to do, each and every day. Just stick to plan.
I’ve always been honest on this blog and I’m going to carry on doing that here. Giving a real account of a fat mum who is desperate to be slimmer again and feel and look like she has her shit together. Whilst also feeling lighter on her feet so her back doesn’t hurt and her bones don’t creek. That might just be my age but the pounds don’t help!
It’s Day Four of being back on plan, checking free and speed foods, writing everything down, drinking plenty of water and rebuilding my resilience to crap and I feel good (I also feel knackered but that’s my baby boy’s fault for the 3:30am wake up call). The plan has changed a little so I’m going to read it all and get used to it. I know once I’ve got a few weigh in’s under my belt and I can see the numbers falling, that I’ll feel better for it. I’m doing this for me now, no babies to conceive or anyone else to impress. Just me. I want to feel like me and be happy with who I see in the mirror!
If time allows there’ll be more updates, more recipes to share, more tips and tricks from some of my incredible friends who have lost an amazing amount of weight and continue to shine sticking to the Slimming World plan and hopefully this is it. The year I lose the majority of this weight for good. To feel like me and be happy in my own skin!