Today I spent a lovely day out with my hubby and Little Mr looking for inspiration for family Christmas presents. We’ve already bought Little Mr’s presents for Christmas so wasn’t under pressure to find him something but armed with a list and some birthday money we headed over to Merry Hill Shopping Centre to browse the shops.
We had a very successful morning ticking off presents for the family. Little Mr spent a good 15 minutes playing with the wooden train set in Early Learning Centre which was lovely to see. He absolutely loves trains and I’d love to get him one of those large wooden train sets that are already set up. He’d absolutely love it. Maybe for his birthday…
As a plus size Mama, I really like shopping at Merry Hill as there are actually shops I can buy clothes from. There’s Simply Be, Yours Clothing, Evans and H&M. It’s so refreshing to go into a shop and know that they’re going to have your size. It’s also fabulous to see clothes on hangers and not just on a page in a catalogue or on a computer screen.
We went into Simply Be and I spotted the dress. A sparkly black sequin number which was absolutely gorgeous on a mannequin that probably wasn’t plus sized! I had to touch it. The dress felt really nice so I went on a mission to find the dress and place the hanger over my head to get a feel for it. I really liked it. It was so pretty, it was sparkly and it felt luxurious.
The price tag was very reasonable too at just £60 but for some reason I put it back on the rail and walked around the rest of the shop. I couldn’t stop thinking about the dress which is actually really unusual for me as I’m a jeans kinda girl who loves covering her legs and isn’t very girly at all.
I walked away from the dress and decided to put my sensible head on. I’ll only wear it a few times if that and it’s a lot of money to spend on a dress for just a couple of occasions. We left the shop empty handed and went on to look for other ideas for Christmas. Over lunch (a Subway chicken breast salad that was synfree) I kept thinking about the dress and wondered how it would look if I tried it on. I spoke to hubby and decided that I needed to go back and try it on. I took the dress in 3 sizes into the changing room (I was so delighted that Simply Be had all 3 sizes for me to try on!) to see how it looked on.
What a fool I felt when I looked down to see I was wearing odd socks! I had to ask for help to do the zip up at the back and the shop assistant seemed to struggle but she reassured me it was the zip and not the fact that it wouldn’t do up but I still felt ridiculously self conscious. I looked into the mirror and was in two minds; it’s a gorgeous party dress but I look fat (I am still fat) my arms look like wobbly sausages and I don’t have attractive legs but the dress was gorgeous and if I make an effort I’ll scrub up okay!
I took a photograph and looked at myself in all the mirrors. The dress I tried on first was the size I thought would fit me best. It did. It was a size smaller than the size I would have picked up 14 weeks ago so I was happy with that. I am a size smaller. Get in!
I’ve got 5 weigh-ins until my works Christmas party where I want to wear this dress. How much weight can I lose in 5 weeks? 5lb, 7lb or 10lb? I’m aiming for 10lb and hopefully it’ll make me feel so much better knowing that I’ve lost weight to feel a million dollars in the dress that I had to go back and buy.
I’ve still got a long way to go. I’ve lost 31.5lb so far but need to lose at least twice that. If I can feel good in the dress at Christmas, I can’t even imagine how I’ll feel when I lose 60+lb or make it close to my ideal weight (which I don’t even really know yet). Weightloss is such a personal thing and all I can think of is how well I’ve done in 14 weeks but there is no way I can get complacent. I need to keep going. Just need to keep my head in the right frame of mind and keep going. It’s not as if I’m depriving myself of anything anyway!
I bought the dress and I love it. It’s hanging on my wardrobe door and it’s so pretty and sparkly. Happy Birthday to me (and thank you to my lovely family for my birthday money which I used to buy this dress!)