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Struggling…and slightly scared!

This weekend has been a struggle. Friday night hubby was out with his work colleagues so I was home alone and did various things round the house and had a lovely dinner (chicken, bacon, philadelphia and salad) but then went on to eat a massive handful or two of haribo! I allocated about 10 weekly propoints to these because I hadn’t used any of them and thought it was a bit of a treat. As soon as I woke up yesterday morning I was starving. I ate my usual bagel and then 2 bread rolls I’d bought home with me from work so that was 14 Propoints down the pan straight away. I felt guilty so did an hour on the wii zumba dancing in the lounge. Hubby was helping his brother and came back with Burger King so I snaffled a couple of his chips. I then proceeded to chuff a whole punnett of cherries and various other little bits which left me with 16 daily propoints left for a family party where the hostess always puts on the most incredible buffet. I was restricted at first having a massive plate of salad then proceeded to laden the plate with a mini sausage roll then a few wedges, a couple of nuggets, 2 mini onion bhajis, a slice of ‘proper’ fresh white bread. Then desserts were brought in and I had a wedge of toffee pavlova, a couple of mini muffins, a piece of shortcake and a couple of those really yummy but highly propointed thorntons caramel shortcake squares. So to use the rest of my daily allowance (16) plus the remainder of my weeklies (38) is 54 Propoints. Have I come in under budget? I have absolutely no idea. Today, I’m struggling again especially this evening hence why i’m writing this down in order to try and stop me going into the kitchen and ruining my day on track. I’ve done an hours exercise today, I took the dog over Walsall Arboretum which was quite nice but slightly shocked that I’d only walked 2.5 miles in the hour i’d been out. I think it was possibly because I wasn’t sure on the route and at times, I felt slightly nervous being in the middle of nowhere surrounded by trees and heathland, silly really.  So, today I’m on track, I’ve earned 6 bonus points (not used) and i’m going to bed shortly so I cannot eat anything else! I’m scared I’m going to fall off the wagon, I really don’t want to and I’d be so disappointed in myself if I did. I think thats why I feel slightly guilty now for eating so much crap this weekend. I know after a massive weightloss this weeks weigh in is going to be minimal but I’d be seriously gutted if I put on.

Looking forward to tomorrow, it’s back to basics…I’ve made myself a salad for lunch and have a chicken stir fry in the fridge for my dinner. I’ve also got Zumba tomorrow night so that should help. I’m hoping if I can curb these cravings to be naughty, I should be ok! Fingers crossed {sig}

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1 Comment

  • Reply Linz M

    Hope you’re feeling a bit better now – we all have days like that were we just cannot keep our heads in the ‘Diet’ game. Don’t beat yourself up – at least you recognise that you went off the rails, I am all too good at burying my head in the sand when that happens!

    xx

    20/07/2011 at 9:31 am
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